


50 Shades of Illegal

by arrafrost



Category: Deadpool (Comics), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Car Sex, Dirty Talk, Exhibitionism, M/M, Public Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-18
Updated: 2012-12-18
Packaged: 2017-11-21 12:07:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/597577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arrafrost/pseuds/arrafrost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wade and Peter's exhibitionism is starting to get out of control with how illegal it's become... and where it might go...</p>
            </blockquote>





	50 Shades of Illegal

“Wade… no. We can’t.” But nothing about his tone or the way he was pushing back into Wade’s embrace was doing anything to protest. Their exhibitionism, as pointed out multiple times by their housemates, was getting out of hand and now things were turning downright illegal. Which public indecency technically already was but this was  _definitely_  all kinds of guilty in the court of law.

“Relax, Spidey. They’re not here.” Wade practically purred as he guided Peter into a half laying down, half standing up position on the hood of the car. His own body followed suit in pressing him down against the cold, metal hood of the temporarily abandoned  _police car_.

Peter tilted his neck, simultaneously pulling away from the kiss and opening his neck up to bites from the merc. “Seriously, Wade. This is definitely more illegal than the laser tag. This is highly illegal. This is ‘I’m a superhero I can’t be doing this’ illegal.”

Wade nudged a knee between Peter’s thighs making him whine loudly, lifting into the touch and begging for more even if he wasn’t speaking words.

“If you’re so super… why not stop me?” His voice was husk and low in Peter’s ear, sending shivers down his spine and causing his back to arch into the warmth of his body. Peter gasped when Wade’s hand traveled lower, palming him hard through his jeans, but he did nothing more to argue against his predicament. Weasel was certainly right about Wade corrupting him because it was pretty damn hard to care about the consequences when Wade pulled his cock out and stroked him long and slow. 

Peter clawed at Wade’s shoulders. “Hurry up!” That didn’t mean he didn’t have priorities to finish this before he got caught… the fact that he was incredibly horny and wanted Wade’s cock inside him three minutes ago was hardly a factor in this decision.

“Impatient. You know, I remember hearing something about virtues during the church days of my youth. Pastor was always going on about this ‘p’ word and saying what a virtue it was.”

“Your penis in my ass would be a nice virtue, now get on with it choir boy.” Peter snapped, rolling his hips as he felt Wade’s finger tips at his entrance. Already lubed up because when did they not carry around more lube than one should keep at their bedside table and enough condoms to wonder where they had room for them all? Fucking everywhere nearly all the time required such things to be on hand. It was a fact of life.

"Add this to the many sins for confession," Wade’s grin was wicked as he shoved two digits into Peter, causing him to grunt and brace against the pain. Even though having sex earlier this morning in the shower and then again on their way to class had already loosened him up.

“Then fuck me in a confessional and we’ll call it a day.” Peter rocked down onto the digits and received another finger before he had to demand it. 

There wasn’t a single pause in the way Wade was finger fucking Peter, but the astonished look on his face definitely caught Peter’s attention. “You want me to fuck you in a church?”

Peter’s face flushed red because yes he had actually just suggested that Wade fuck him in a house of god. While he may not go to church regularly and Wade’s only religion was probably worshiping the creators of churros, that was still rather low on the moral scale. 

Peter was absolutely going to hell for how much that turned him on.

Wade took Peter’s embarrassed and lewd expression for a yes because his grin spread wider and he was nodding happily at the prospect of defiling a sacred building. Without much care or thought, Wade removed his fingers - despite Peter’s protests and he should probably be ashamed that he protested more about that than he did their current location. He let Peter squirm against the police car before he finally positioned himself at Peter’s entrance and pushes forward, filling Peter with one thrust. 

He moans, long and loud even though he should be keeping quiet all things considered, and allows Wade’s body to cover his own. It’s not that cold out but Wade’s warmth is a welcomed comfort in contrast to the cold metal against Peter’s back. His breath is hot in his ear and Wade’s tongue pressing into the sensitive corners of his ear while he nips on the lobe is doing nothing to keep him from crying out into the darkness of the parking lot. 

The car rocks as Wade’s pace picks up speed and Peter almost finds the noise of the car being jostled annoying until Wade’s lips are moving against his ear. “Look at you. Spread out for me on top of a cop car. Wanting me to fuck you in a confessional… You’d fuck me just about anywhere, wouldn’t you?

Peter’s breath comes in short gasps and whines because there’s no denying what Wade is saying to him. Location doesn’t matter to him - actually in some cases it matters quite a bit because some of them turn him on a lot more than other places - as long as Wade is slamming his cock into him at a pace that makes him dizzy.

“I bet you’d get off more if the cop was inside the car, watching me fuck you on his hood right now.” 

Peter moaned, pushing hard into Wade’s thrusts. 

“I’m going to tie you up and fuck you in public while you’re still in costume so all your adoring fans can see exactly how shameless Spider-man really is.”

“Fuck, Wade!”

“You’d love it if everyone saw you open beneath me, taking as much as you could and begging for more while they all watched.”

“No!” Peter cried but his body arched into Wade’s touch, his cock jumping at the words and his voice. 

“I bet you’d love every minute of it. Putting on a show for everyone to see. Just think about what the newspapers would say. Filthy Spider-Man Fucked Raw.” Wade punctuated each word with a deep thrust, each aiming for his prostrate.

Peter had no more words of protest for the scenario, he could only whine, moan and buck beneath Wade’s body, craving more touches, more words, more friction, anything that would push him over the edge. 

That was when Wade’s hand wrapped around his aching cock and stroked him with a quick and determined hand. Peter’s body shook from his orgasm, the intensity making him think he was going to black out on a police car and Wade would have to carry him back like the mess he was with cum all over his stomach. 

Wade continued to thrust, although they were becoming much more erratic, especially when he sat upright more and opened his mouth. “Oh hello, Officer.”

Peter’s eyes flew open and he tried to scramble away from Wade but Wade pinned him in place and refused to stop fucking him with short, sharp thrusts that had Peter’s body shivering from over-stimulation. His eyes looked around frantically, in every direction after the one Wade was looking in proved to have no one standing there and in no other direction could he see a soul. It couldn’t be- Wade thrust in one more time before he was grunting and letting his body fall against Peter as he came.

With a loud thud, the back of Peter’s head hit the hood of the car. “You’re a fucking asshole.”

“I’m not even going to make that pun, that’s how satisfied I am right now.”

“Prick.” Peter growled, rolling his eyes and prodding Wade in the side with a finger.

“Slut.”

Peter opened his mouth but in all fairness… he couldn’t argue with cold, hard fact. “I’m cold and I’d rather not be arrested tonight. So can we get up now?”

He felt Wade grin on his shoulder. “Only if we can stop at a church on our way home.”

Peter half regretted saying that in the middle of sex… but what he was most disappointed with was the idea that he would be too exhausted to fully appreciate having sex in a confessional with Wade after all that had happened. “Maybe another night.” He was most definitely going straight to hell without passing any form of spiritual ‘go’.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on [Tumblr](http://arrafrost.tumblr.com/)


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